tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-85806233032620557152024-03-07T15:36:51.708-08:00Hellish Holidays Where great expectations meet the cold slap of reality.
A blog by Laura Huntt Foti.
13th anniversary Thanksgiving 2019!Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.comBlogger224125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-37347263087424930642023-11-22T15:16:00.000-08:002023-11-22T15:18:55.490-08:00Is Your Family Dysfunctional? A Holiday QuizDo you dread holidays? Have to gird yourself to face the relatives? Most likely your anxiety relates to sharing a room with a dysfunctional family. To see where yours falls along the spectrum, take this insightful quiz.
PART 1
Which of the following describes members of your family? Note: One person can qualify in multiple categories. Step-relatives count! And don’t forget to include yourself!Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-83210417748990471682023-11-22T15:02:00.000-08:002023-11-22T15:45:12.556-08:00The Year of the Pop-Up TimerMy dad was not known as a cook. He must have made dinner for himself after my parents divorced, but that’s hard to believe based on the Thanksgivings he put together. He insisted on hosting, and he did his best, but let's just say we didn't go to his place for the food.Finally, one year he agreed to let me cook. I'd been bragging about my culinary prowess, and he gave in and accepted my claim Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-13674853809467432412023-11-22T01:00:00.000-08:002023-11-22T15:02:03.990-08:00How to Avoid Turkey Disasters
Thanksgiving brings the potential for turkey disasters, not just dry breast meat but call-the-fire-department disasters.
<!-- anything you want on lists pages goes here -->
<!-- delete hideinlists and one if you want intro displayed on list pages -->
<!-- intro goes here -->
<!-- remainder goes here -->
Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-68737945105295399742023-11-21T15:30:00.000-08:002023-11-22T15:05:30.824-08:00We Gather Together - With AtheistsOne week until Thanksgiving and I thought I would share this. It's from a new musical I'm working on.
Thanksgiving is not a religious holiday, but all the songs are essentially hymns. This one's for the atheists. And because I live in Los Angeles, it's about that too.
We All Arrived Here
(sung to the tune of "We Gather Together")
We
all arrived here without any Hosannas
We basted, Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-36347435347725533482019-12-31T04:00:00.000-08:002019-12-31T04:00:02.585-08:00Times Square: The Sleazy YearsI grew up in the suburbs of New York and had only one goal: get to The City. As a teenager I took the train in whenever possible and soaked up as much '70s atmosphere as I could. And believe me, in the '70s the place was thick with atmosphere--a stew of graffiti, beggars, X-rated movie theaters with "greeters," Diane Arbus subjects, and an overarching sense of menace and inflation. It was not a Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-19486921900904050152019-12-30T10:27:00.000-08:002019-12-30T10:27:09.110-08:00Best Wishes for a Rainbow-Filled New YearJ'adore Randy Rainbow! He wasn't always the famous Trump-teasing superstar he is today. Once he was just as bitter and unsuccessful as the rest of us, and not afraid to put it out there.
This is Randy's first-ever video, posted 10 years ago this week and the Source of Video Wonderfulness.
<!-- anything you want on lists pages goes here -->
<!-- delete hideinlists and one if you want intro Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-59080942648894822062019-12-18T07:30:00.000-08:002019-12-30T22:57:42.319-08:00Home for the Holiday
My first solo apartment followed a string of four nightmare
roommates in four years.
The book publishing company co-worker on the Upper West Side who lurked outside my
bedroom door, waiting for me to go to the bathroom so she’d have someone to
talk to besides her cat.
The Wisconsonite in Chelsea with the bad nose job who dotted
the eyes on her passive-aggressive notes with littleLaura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-54062208162027522882019-12-17T07:30:00.001-08:002020-01-01T08:39:08.791-08:00The Endless Promise of Christmas Magazines'Tis the season for a baking plan and here I sit, surrounded by 25 years of Christmas magazines. The oldest ones date from 1980 and the newest one, well, I bought it last week. That means I've been optimistic about Christmas baking for more than a quarter of a century, and I'm no Martha Stewart. I can't believe it. I'm sicker than I thought, and that's saying something.
For one thing, why in theLaura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-74545254546162422292019-11-29T07:00:00.000-08:002019-12-08T12:06:06.449-08:00Black Friday FrenzyTramplings and fist fights and screaming galore
That's the hellish Black Friday we've come to adore.
You don't have to keep track of the mayhem amount -
Just head on over to Black Friday Death Count.
Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-35601088006211476252019-11-23T13:01:00.000-08:002019-11-24T18:21:01.552-08:00Hellish Holidays Hot Sauce!From the fiery depths of Thanksgiving comes Hellish Holidays Hot Sauce from Howling Mad. Excellent with turkey.
Buy this seasonal sauce now - supplies are limited!
Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-70350969509482531052019-10-21T15:55:00.001-07:002019-10-21T15:55:08.294-07:00Cheesy Knock-Offs: <!-- anything you want on lists pages goes here -->
<!-- delete hideinlists and one if you want intro displayed on list pages -->
<!-- intro goes here -->
<!-- remainder goes here -->
You say money's tight and you can't go all out this Halloween? Don't cheap out with a cheesy knock-off costume, like a red-and-white striped shirt sold in a package called "Where's the Stripey Dude?"
Way Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-65637256073641973892018-12-23T11:01:00.002-08:002018-12-23T17:43:48.824-08:00Christmas Is Getting OlderChristmas comes faster but means less. The holiday's increasing commercialism is a trope time-tested, measurably accurate and increasingly depressing.
In 2018, retailers jump-started holiday ads in early November. For ye olde brick-and-mortars, it feels like a desperate attempt to convince us they're still viable. Amazon's Hurricane Florence-level flooding of the airwaves has a sadistic air ofLaura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-77083100181759838612018-11-29T15:22:00.002-08:002018-12-23T11:06:27.828-08:00Ugly Undertones to Rudoph the Red-Nosed Reindeer & Santa Claus Is Coming to Town
Twitter posts call out the nastiness underlying a perennial Christmas animated special; Huffington Post aggregates the observations to create a damning portrait.
And another cherished memory is spoiled.
www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/rudolph-the-red-nosed-reindeer-disturbing-details_us_5bfe058fe4b0f43bf2661c7f
<!-- anything you want on lists pages goes here -->
<!-- delete Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-7480223330570838572018-10-31T12:51:00.001-07:002020-09-28T13:46:29.123-07:00The House from HellFor nine years I lived in a freak house. I'm not talking about my family, necessarily, but about the house itself. I lived in one of the most upscale suburbs and school districts in the country--but our house was a falling-down rental at the end of a long, rutted driveway. It wasn't exactly The Glass Castle, more like Grey Gardens without the money.
My brother in our creepy driveway
Today thatLaura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-82574681153452320272018-08-28T15:47:00.000-07:002018-08-28T15:47:01.242-07:00Holidays in Hell<!-- anything you want on lists pages goes here -->
<!-- delete hideinlists and one if you want intro displayed on list pages -->
<!-- intro goes here -->
<!-- remainder goes here -->
This site examines holidays as defined in American English: Thanksgiving, Independence Day, etc. But in British English, the word "holiday" means vacation. So, a hellish holiday can mean a really awful Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-31287720948675856052018-07-08T11:15:00.000-07:002018-12-25T13:11:39.009-08:00The Phantom AnniversaryThis week was and wasn't my thirtieth wedding anniversary. It was, because I got married in 1988. And it wasn't, because we split up 11 years ago. <!-- anything you want on lists pages goes here -->
<!-- delete hideinlists and one if you want intro displayed on list pages -->
<!-- intro goes here -->
<!-- remainder goes here -->
I think of this date as my phantom anniversary. Most Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-38909220691153547582018-04-29T23:24:00.000-07:002018-12-25T13:12:08.535-08:00New York, Mon Amour PerduMy New York was studded with cramped record and bookstores, unique boutiques, grungy abandoned buildings, out-of-the-way clubs. Today, abandoned and out-of-the-way have been taken over and jam packed by chain purveyors of brows, Brazilians and boba. Cupping, computers and craft beers. Smoothies, cycles and cell phones.
None of these retail categories existed when I left New York 30 years ago. Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-49711467156014766172017-10-31T06:00:00.000-07:002018-12-25T13:14:35.106-08:00Halloween Date From HellIt just seems wrong to complain about a Hellish Halloween. After all, isn't that the whole point? Yes, there are parades and parties and dressing up. But the holiday's very nature is to be creepy. It's about scaring small children, TPing and egging, eating too much candy, getting separated from your hard-to-recognize friends...there are so many ways this gruesome holiday can go bad. Here's one Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-50941483440256228572017-09-27T10:18:00.000-07:002017-09-27T10:49:31.395-07:00Christmas Is Always ComingNo, you're not imagining things. Christmas consumerism comes earlier every year. And this year may set the record: Dollar Tree has just released its 2017 "Holiday Book." <!-- anything you want on lists pages goes here -->
<!-- delete hideinlists and one if you want intro displayed on list pages -->
<!-- intro goes here -->
<!-- remainder goes here -->
Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-71567437605219866762017-09-25T11:42:00.000-07:002018-12-25T13:19:46.624-08:00A Public Service Announcement: Emergency Communications
Being unable to find out if my mother was dead or alive in
Puerto Rico for five days post-Maria was terrifying, especially because she had
a broken leg and was housebound. I learned a lot from this horrendous
experience, mostly that you need to have a plan in place BEFORE a disaster. And
that plan has to be more than “Call me as soon as you can.”
Here are my hurricane-inspired guidelines forLaura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-54246385923243534862016-12-19T01:30:00.002-08:002016-12-19T01:33:53.343-08:00A Democrat's Holiday Lament
It's
Christmas 2016 and you're not feeling it. Somehow you've managed to throw up some decorations, bake
some cookies and wrap some gifts. But the more you
try to stoke the flames of holiday joy, the more apparent it becomes: This will
be a sad one. SAD, as in Seasonal Affective Disorder. SAD as in Sorrowful, Anguished, Distraught.
You've
tried to get into the spirit, but instead of Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-80006901963637656872016-12-07T13:21:00.000-08:002018-12-28T00:12:02.297-08:00Unthankful
Parents go to a lot of trouble to give their kids delicious food, time with extended family and memorable experiences on Thanksgiving. Here's how some ungrateful wretches respond. (Caution: $#&;*$%^ language ahead)
That Darn Election
Those Darn Slackers
Irredeemable Slacker (Almost) Redeemed
Note: This guy has been on YouTube as long as Hellish Holidays has been Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-26886220271840164572016-11-02T23:25:00.000-07:002016-12-07T12:38:08.923-08:00A Very Jimmy HalloweenThe 6th anniversary of watching parents humiliate their kids and show off the poor parenting skills that created these tantrum-throwing sugar junkies.<!-- anything you want on lists pages goes here -->
<!-- delete hideinlists and one if you want intro displayed on list pages -->
<!-- intro goes here -->
<!-- remainder goes here -->
Hungry for more? Here are the previous editions.
Laura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-60008185110393669992015-11-25T07:00:00.000-08:002015-11-25T07:00:04.282-08:00#ThanksgivingFailHere we go again.
Glitches in plans longstanding and last-minute.
Travel that dooms any sense of thankfulness and reinforces the theory that hell is other people.
Family that threatens to do the same.
Eating to the point of bursting seams, guilt and depression.
Continued drought...or early snow.
Black Friday mania and marketing run amok.
The dreary trek backLaura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8580623303262055715.post-86151794767937379962015-11-21T09:34:00.000-08:002023-11-20T18:34:56.886-08:00A Hildegarde Thanksgiving"The Incomparable Hildegarde" (1906-2005) was a star for 70 years. At her peak, in the 1940s and '50s, she was the top supper club entertainer in New York. Despite her Wisconsin roots, she had a sophisticated European air about her: She wore long gowns and opera-length gloves. Her ever-present handkerchief served a role comparable to that of Steven Tyler's scarves. She was best known for the songLaura Huntt Fotihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16133459519775236929noreply@blogger.com2